La Agencia

I run an ad agency
and I've got a crowd to sway,
If you’ve got blonde hair, don’t hit the beach in July;
if you’ve got black hair or just one ball,
on Tuesdays in winter, chat with a dog,
and ask for tips on how to invest your cash;
if you’re broke, I suggest a solid job:
breeding rabbits and hope you get struck by lightning.
If you feel like your head’s spinning around,
if you’ve got any doubts, don’t look for answers,
here’s your home, the door’s wide open,
you can buy whatever you want and pay when you can;
whether you can or can’t depends on your rank;
if you complain about the letters, I’ll send the lawyer,
if you don’t care, your cynicism kills me,
better we all play the tourism game.
What a lovely washing machine! And what a nice lady!
What luck to be chosen, out of a million, your letter;
raise your skirts and be unique;
for your personal hygiene, use this sandpaper;
if you notice irritation, I’ve got this soap for you,
it’s the only one in the world, made from Columbus’ egg;
if you see your skin falling apart,
ask your husband and hope he gets struck by lightning!
I run an ad agency
and I've got a crowd to sway.