Antes de Sumir

I'm tired of trying, of pretending I'm fine
I fell silent in the dark, just to worry no one
So much pain hidden behind a crooked smile
A heart beating slow, feelings dead inside

I found myself fighting against myself
Searching for peace in a world so dense
I screamed from within, no one heard
Just me and my void, was all that was left

Empty promises, hugs that do not heal
Beautiful words that in the end only hurt
I drowned in memories that will never return
And in the silence, I count my own signs

Before I vanish, I wanted to say
That even broken, I tried not to lose myself
With every step, I carried a piece of me away
But no one noticed when the end arrived

I saw you drift away, but didn't know what to do
I stood still, without the courage to understand you
I pretended it didn't hurt, but it hurt too much
Your absence screams in the silence you left behind

I wanted to go back, to change all that I didn't do
To look in your eyes and say I always wanted you
But now only memories linger in the air
And the wish to have never let you go without a word

If I had told you that it hurt me too
Would the end truly have been this way?
I blame myself for every word I kept inside
And for not running after you when you cried: I waited

Before I vanish, I wanted to confess
That I also tried to love you
But fear won, and I hid myself away
And when I realized, you were no longer there

Maybe in another time, we'd get it right?
Maybe there's a place that's less of a desert?
Where love doesn't get lost in the pain
And we understand each other without resentment

Perhaps in another life, with fewer scars
Perhaps without the fears, without so many crises
But in this one, only silence was left to bear
Everything we didn't say before we vanished

Before I vanish, I leave my last sound
Of two hearts that loved, but struck the wrong chord
If one day you remember me, let the sky hear
That I was real, before I vanished