A Double Suicide

Hey, why can’t you even look me in the eye? Why is it that you say
"I can’t handle the stare" or something like that?
Who the hell
turned me into this kind of woman?

Hey, I’ve been waiting
for you to come after me all this time.
Finally got to see you, but you won’t even hold me? Just a bit?
Life’s a mess. It’s all your fault, you know.

I don’t get it. What’s happiness anyway?
Which one is it?
It’s such a pain.
Should I spill my brains and guts out for you to see?
Look at this woman, dyed to the bone.

I love you, I really do, I’ll give you everything.
No, I hate you, I really can’t stand you.
You’re just gonna throw it back at me? It’s too late for that, damn it.
It’s all because of you, every bit of it.

I know.
Happiness and misery, they disappear every second.
This cold yet warm hand has tasted it all.
I think there’s nothing left beyond this.

You’re so annoying, my cute one.
It hurts but feels good, this goodbye.
Those days that have passed,
I want to end it all, life and all, just as it is.

I’m fading away.
I’m all alone.