Horóscopo

Aries
Your teeth are full of cavities
Taurus
Your girlfriend is screwing someone else
Gemini
You're a dumbass
Virgo
I think it's over

Capricorn, Leo, Cancer
Oh my god, so much nonsense

Libra
Don't leave the house, you have no friends
Sagittarius
They hate you at work
Aquarius
Today you're gonna drown
Pisces
You caught syphilis

Capricorn, Leo, Cancer
Oh my god, so much nonsense

Aries
Taurus
Gemini
Cancer
You have cancer