Juegos

I'm a kid on the playground with dusty fingers
Gathering leaves to avoid talking about what I hide
I learned to chase after everything that runs away
And to call love everything that destroys me

I fill my chest with paper hugs
Dancing with knives, close to my skin
I search in others for the love I never had
And I call Home the pain that consumes me

Maybe that's why when I see light, I turn it off
Because I'm scared of what shines too bright
I used to scream, and now I stay quiet
Because inside me, I feel like something's broken

And I don't wait anymore
I'm tired of being the ground in your hole
I've been hibernating for almost a whole winter
I convinced myself that the cold is what I want

And I can't take it anymore
I declare myself a loser in these games
Because when I fall in love, I speed up
I never hit the brakes

Because when I get my hopes up, I always crash
And I don't want to
Be a "Hey, how's it going? It's me again"

I don't even smoke anymore, and you treat me like an ashtray
And if I die
Please don't even come to the funeral

I think
I've gotten used to the silence
Of never saying what I feel
I sleep alone with those verses

That I wrote for you
I know
Every kiss steals my breath
And takes a little piece of me

(I'm real)
(I'd be lying if I said I don't love you)
(Because even my demons put you first)
(Even knowing your love is fleeting)

And I can't take it anymore
I declare myself a loser in these games
Because when I fall in love, I speed up
I never hit the brakes

Because when I get my hopes up, I always crash
And I don't want to
Be a "Hey, how's it going? It's me again"

I don't even smoke anymore, and you treat me like an ashtray
And if I die
Please don't even come to the funeral

I'm pathetic at these games
Because I can't even bet a "I love you"
I'm romantic but sincere
Because when playing, I never come in first